Last night I had a dream that I was headlining a star-studded Dolly Parton tribute concert at the Kennedy Center. (Don't laugh, assholes, it could happen.) Dolly was in the audience. After Beyonce finished the final chorus of "Jolene", it was my turn to take the stage and close the show with "9 to 5". (Who the hell came up with this lineup?? It's horrible!) So Margot Kidder announces me (what the hell was Margot Kidder doing emceeing?) and I go up and start to sing flawlessly. I'm not being conceited, it just happened to sound really good. I look out into the crowd and not only do I not see Dolly Parton, but I realize that the only people now in the audience are a homeless woman and my Biology teacher from 8th grade.
Then I woke up.
Listen, no one said that was gonna be a good story. It is what it is. You want better plot lines and a friggin' production number??? Watch Glee.
Meanwhile, I'm featured in the November issue of Ion Magazine. Check it out here, idiot!! Thanks Mikey Rox for the great interview!
And, at no additional charge, please enjoy this clip from last week, of the great Stephen Schwartz (introduced by moi) singing his own "Chanson" in support of the Trevor Project. We're good together, nu?