Email Randy

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Do You See What I See?

You know those big scary soldiers dressed head-to-toe in camouflage who march around Grand Central and Times Square with their big scary guns and big scary helmets? Maybe I’m just not getting the big picture here, but I don’t think they really are fully grasping the concept of camouflage. Because, you guys… I can totally still see them. In fact, I find that outside of any sort of desert or grassland situation, the camouflage battle dress only enhances their prominence. And I’m not even like a terrorist or a jungle snake or anything. They should probably be dressing up to look like Rosetta Stone kiosks or the exterior of Starbucks; not twigs and bushes. I'm almost positive it would be less conspicuous and aid in the illusion. The full-out army fatigues just seem a little douchey when we're, say, in Barnes and Noble.

Meanwhile, I'm finally getting into the holiday spirit! (And I don't mean like "Hanukkah" or "Kwanzaa" or "Secretary's Day". I mean the real holiday.) Mariah Carey's Christmas album has been working overtime on my iPod since Thanksgiving, and I'm living! I've always gotten shit from a lot of my anti-Semitic friends about my extensive Christmas music collection (cuz of the Jewishness), but I stand by it.

And Mariah's not the only deev giving me the Christmas crunchies these days... I recently got a double dose of holiday homo happiness at Birdland. Stephanie J. Block and Christine Ebersole (with the great Billy Stritch) each sold out holiday concerts there last week, and I crashed 'em both. So incredible! The Christine/Billy concert has become something of a Christmas tradition for me, as this was my third year in attendance, and let me just say this: if those two have not released a Christmas album by this time next year, I will climb to the top of the Christmas tree at Rockerfeller Plaza and leap to my death, crushing Meredith Vieira live on the Today Show. That might sound overdramatic, but it really is vital! Billy Stritch's arrangements are so fantastic! (BTW - The gorge Brent Barrett is celebrating his new Xmas album at Birdland on 12/13 and 12/14. Hit it!)

Check out me and the exquisite Stephanie Block. We're using this one for our Christmas cards this year.

God, look how radiant she is! (Stephanie, too.)

No comments: