So, ready? I’m over Summer. Like…over it. I know this might tarnish my reputation as ‘most popular girl in school’, since people tend to get really bitchy and defensive whenever I say that. Like, how dare I - the Snow Queen - try and fart my icy frost all over the warmth and fun of their season. Well I enjoy fun and warmth and shorts and flip-flops as much as the next little tart, but I hold firm to my belief that New York City is no place for 90-degree weather. The same way gays do not belong in the workplace. It is dangerous and uncomfortable for everyone involved. I mean it’s not even noon and I’ve already schvitzed off half my makeup. I can’t sleep…I can’t breathe…and just look at my hair...LOOK AT IT!
Happy August, PS.
And speaking of getting too old for the life: The other night I was at The Triad up on 72nd Street. They do a concert series there called “Just a Piano”. (Need I explain the concept?) This week’s guest star was the great Lillias white! I live for her…obviously. “Skinny, white, Jew- boys just love their large black women.” I was so kindly reminded of this commonly known fact by a black friend of mine after gushing over having just seen Lil’s show. (I know it’s not right to say “black friend". Sorry. He’s actually more an Espresso finish.) I don’t know why the gay Jews have such a potent connection to their big busty sistahz, but we cannot get enough. Of course, there are exceptions to every rule: I actually really hate the horrible woman sitting in the booth at my subway station in Astoria who purposely takes her sweet time so I’ll miss my train in the morning, and who always refuses to change my large bills even though she totally could if she wanted to. But then, I’ve never seen her in concert.
I digress… The point is: Lillias White is simply a magical gift bestowed upon this planet to make us all incredibly happy. She is brilliant in every way. Her show was comprised of standards like Cy Coleman’s “The Best is Yet to Come”, as well as tunes from past shows she’s done, like the title from Ain’t Misbehavin’ and an earth-shattering torch song from Dinah Was (an off-Broadway bio musical in which Lillias played Blues Queen, Dinah Washington.) Halfway through, Lil murdered us with a hilarious number called “Big Fat Daddy” which told of her helpless affinity for the large and lovely man with a little extra somethin’ to hold on to, as she shamelessly flirted and teased the fellas in the audience. I’d never heard it before, and I don’t know where the hell it’s from, but it’s soooo my new audition song. If you've not been, The Triad is a small space and made for a very cozy and intimate performance which featured as much of White's priceless banter as it did great music. To quote one of my favorites of the evening: "Whether ya' black, white, gay, straight, orange, whatever...you gotta get yourself some lovin' in this world, 'cause...Are there any minors in the audience tonight?... [whispers]...this - shit - is - crazy." Her delivery was better, but how right you are, Lil.
After that, I schlepped down to The Metropolitan Room in Chelsea for the latest installment of Friends with Benefits, a concert for Broadway Cares created and hosted by my friends Gerard Salvador and Amy Wolk. It was a great time as usual, and offered a buffet of Broadway stars, including Leigh Ann Larkin, who plays Dainty June in the current revival of PATTI LUPONE (featuring ‘Gypsy’). She is perhaps the loveliest person alive, and sat down with me before the show for a little interview… Which brings us to news of my latest gig: Starting next week, I’ll be doing my own daily column for BroadwaySpace.com, where you’ll be able to find a few of my interviews (like the one with Leigh Ann) as well as some other fun stuff. Should be cute. So if you're not already a member, get your life together! Sign up and come play with me!
Call me later.